Let’s break the conspiracy of silence; let’s shame the rapist and not the victim, pleads Vibha Bakshi

Break the conspiracy of silence (regarding rape). Have a conversation with your families; talk about gender biases and then maybe move on to gender violence, because it all starts at home. If together we can break the conspiracy of silence, our job is done. “Come forward and help a survivor so that she has the courage and conviction to know that she has done nothing wrong. We have to shame the rapist, not the victim of the crime.” These impassioned pleas were made at the meeting of July 28 by Ms Vibha Bakshi, once a leading journalist in the US who has since donned the avatar of an award-winning film-maker.

She was speaking about the making of “Daughters of Mother India”, which won this year’s National Award for “Best Film on Social Issues”. Ms Vibha Bakshi started her presentation at the Club with a four-minute clip from her 45- minute film. It featured some gory details of the actual incident surrounding the girl, named “Nirbhaya” by the media to protect her identity; it then showed archival footage of the aftermath, with angry, restless people pouring onto the streets, shouting slogans demanding justice. In brief interviews, police officers and civil society members talked about the need for change and for justice; but the one thing that overshadowed everything was the girl’s own fierce desire to live which she conveyed even as life was ebbing away; and that really triggered the change.

“The story of ‘Daughters of Mother India’ begins after the rape and murder of Nirbhaya. It is the story of what happened to our country after Nirbhaya. We have all experienced the emotions, a lot of us were even a part of it.” Ms Bakshi said she was a very proud daughter of India because she believed that there was no other country in the world that reacted to gender crime in the way that India had done. When she organised the premier of her film in New York a few days ago, her opening sentence was the confident statement, “We are not a country of rapists”. Warming up to her subject, she recalled that while making the film she had turned completely non-judgmental because, like others, she used to believe that “it doesn’t happen to families like us… We are well educated, well travelled and so on; but gender bias runs very deep in our families, too. That is why I say that we have to break the conspiracy of silence”.

Often, when shame is heaped on the survivor, it is virtually impossible to get justice. Fortunately, in the case of the Shakti Mills case in Bombay for one, the photojournalist who was gangraped got justice because her family backed her. Her mother stood by her and said, we will get justice, come what may! “That’s why I say, we have to break the conspiracy of silence; let’s start by saying our sons and daughters are equal. So that when the son does commit wrong, we have the guts to bring it up and accept it. We should not say, ‘Oh, we can’t speak because it’s going to bring shame to us’.” Ms Bakshi revealed that even she had suffered indignities at the workplace. And what had she done? She had thanked her stars that the offender had gone away and that she had emerged intact. This was because of the general disinclination to rock the boat. If she could have such feelings, what about those with less education and from a different strata of society? she questioned.

If, God forbid, something were to happen in one’s own, not someone else’s family, would anyone have the guts to speak out? That was the reason why criminals got away. “When we understand where the shame lies, maybe we will be able to address the issue. It’s not them versus us. We are in this together. You are all influencers; let it start from us and let it trickle down.” President Dr. Sonya Mehta wondered why her film had not received the kind of backlash and condemnation from government and citizens’ groups who usually said that such films tarnished the image of India. In the case of the BBC film some months ago, the response had been quite inflammatory. Ms Bakshi said she was lucky in this respect, but added: “I think every filmmaker makes a film with the intention of doing good. I cannot speak on behalf of the other film, but I think the reason our film has received the attention it has is because the emotions and intentions resonated with the people of India.”

“Our film has left people with hope; I think it is that hope that they have taken forward and now it’s just snowballing. I think it’s getting bigger and bigger. Ravi Sheth asked me, what next? I said I would have moved onto the next film but now I am committed because I have got to take this (movement) forward.” Interestingly, the United Nations had not initially wanted to screen the film. When questioned, they said, “after ‘India’s Daughter’, we are not touching any film” that deals with issues of rape in India. Ms Bakshi was unwilling to take that rejection lying down. “I don’t care if this film doesn’t win awards in Sweden, Finland and so on; it’s (based) where the problem is and we are addressing it.

“The UN was persuaded and agreed to screen the film showing India’s side of the story. After seeing her film, even the Huffington Post wrote, “It’s India’s story of resolve, activism and hope”. As a proud Indian, she wanted her side of the story to be told to the rest of the world. Even the (Hindi) dubbing artists have not taken money for their work and want to be part of the movement. Is this not a good story? Why does everything have to be sensationalised? “This issue is very important to us and we have to win.” Satyan Israni pointed out that politicians also needed to be sensitised, for they came up with ludicrous statements, that the victim’s attire was to blame or that she was the being provocative. Agreeing with him, Ms Bakshi said not only politicians, even the police, the judiciary, or “somebody from your home” could make provocative statements.

That was the reason why she keeps saying, “just keep talking”; somewhere down the line, someone will get the message. She was aware that it was easy to sensationalise an issue but she also knew that it would help no one if she inflamed passions. Therefore, she wanted to highlight the positive role that hope played in any given situation. She did not want to leave viewers with disgust and disillusionment but with hope, because positive thoughts multiplied easily and helped change things. That her belief was not misplaced was proven when the police, her toughest critics, started screening her film all over the country. In Bombay in December, 2014, 300 top police officers, including the Commissioner of Police, watched the film and decided to take the message forward. Recalling the making of the film, Ms Bakshi said that it was through sheer karma that she was able to meet the then Police Commissioner, Mr. Neeraj Kumar. Wanting to gain access to the police control and command room, she had told Mr. Kumar, “I am a stakeholder in this society. If we lose this fight, if we lose this momentum, I have everything to lose. You have to trust me.” The Police Commissioner had looked at her and said, “I am a father of two daughters”. Next day, she was granted access to the control room. But, that very night the control room received a call about a five-year-old having been gang-raped. Her team also rushed to the spot and found a frail body covered in blood. The media named her “Gudiya”. She was found 48 hours after she had gone missing. She was rushed to hospital and there was far more pain to be experienced there.

The doctors taking the X-ray talked about some foreign objects inside her. Disturbed and shaken, Ms Bakshi returned to her hotel room and called her husband to say that she was not brave enough to do the story. “We have very young children and the emotions that I feel… I just do not have the strength”. They spoke for hours and in the end he told her, “You cannot un-see what you have seen. The only way you will get closure is if you finish this film and one life gets saved, then this journey will be worth it”. She returned to the police control and command room. Ms Bakshi added, “It’s very easy to make a sensational film. It’s a guaranteed sell, that is why I decided I will not go to any networks even though I was making films for the US and this was my first film out of India. It was very important that we make a responsible film even though it might never see the light of day.” Ms Bakshi said when she went into the police station, she did not paint everyone with the same brush. Most people did not consider policemen to be human beings. But she told her team to “keep a very, very open lens”. And when they went in they realised that the Interestingly, the United Nations had not initially wanted to screen the film. When questioned, they said, “after ‘India’s Daughter’, we are not touching any film” that deals with issues of rape in India. Ms Bakshi was unwilling to take that rejection lying down. “I don’t care if this film doesn’t win awards in Sweden, Finland and so on; it’s (based) where the problem is and we are addressing it.” The UN was persuaded and agreed to screen the film showing India’s side of the story. After seeing her film, even the Huffington Post wrote, “It’s India’s story of resolve, activism and hope”. As a proud Indian, she wanted her side of the story to be told to the rest of the world. Even the (Hindi) dubbing artists have not taken money for their work and want to be part of the movement. Is this not a good story? Why does everything have to be sensationalised?

“This issue is very important to us and we have to win.” Satyan Israni pointed out that politicians also needed to be sensitised, for they came up with ludicrous statements, that the victim’s attire was to blame or that she was the being provocative. Agreeing with him, Ms Bakshi said not only politicians, even the police, the judiciary, or “somebody from your home” could make provocative statements. That was the reason why she keeps saying, “just keep talking”; somewhere down the We missed you. Programme Chairman Ravi Sheth and his spouse Amita with the guest speaker policemen had the same feelings as them. They also experienced anger, disgust, sadness and frustration like other human beings. She had also opened the Shakti Mills gang-rape case of 2013 and spoke to the investigating officers about all that they had gone through while investigating the case. The film she had made was now playing all across the city, with PVR and Inox Cinemas screening it. Ms Bakshi concluded by saying that her film, “Daughters of Mother India”, had been dubbed in various languages and she would arrange screenings as and when requested by any group of individuals.